GIRLS, DONT LOSE YOURSELF.

Shopper Basket - Bohemia Design | White Denim Jacket - Mango  | Knotted Blouse - Mango  | GG Belt - Gucci  | High Waisted Jeans - Asos | Mules - Topshop (similar)

 

Do you know what I find is a hard thing about being single (apart from all the girls holidays, nights out, doing what you want when you want & spending all your money on yourself... tough I know, but someone's got to do it) it's keeping my style. Sounds odd, because if anything you'd think having a boyfriend would be more likely to change your style. Like those times you whip back the fitting room curtain to a wincing face or you try on your new Asos delivery and they say "it's alright" & then turn back to Netflix (FYI, "alright" was not what I was going for). Those things never bothered me that much, I would wear want I wanted to regardless. I've posted about it before in fact, that I used to wear things my ex thought were gross and I loved. I didn't give a monkeys Uncle then, but now it's like I've got to get my game on. The first few nights I went out out I was on the verge of digging out a 2010 Topshop bodycon dress, because I felt I should. That's what the other single girls in 'the club' wear, right? Or maybe a lace bralet and a pair of Joni jeans? Is that the key to pulling success? I just felt like I should ramp it up a gear, tart myself up a bit if you will. After all, now is the crucial time for guys to think you're a catch. They don't have to know that I sleep with a bear, kiss my dog on the mouth or that I'm usually sick after 4 glasses of wine. I'll just look slutty, do some shots and play it cool, is literally what went through my mind. They will love that, I thought. 

It's something I didn't really think would happen, I didn't think I'd change or feel that sort of pressure. Then I kind of thought about how ridiculous my pep talks to myself sounded. Do I really want to be that girl that goes out and cant walk because she's wearing a 'Pretty Little Thing' dress that's 2 sizes too small & patent platform shoes with heels like pencils... absolutely not. That is not me. Maybe that is what some guys like (I can think of one or two) but the one that's right for me wont. He will like some of the baggy weird shit I wear. He will appreciate my Asos orders, my culottes and my huge collection of grey t-shirts and he will think I look nice in them. Don't get me wrong, I've had to sort myself out a bit. Shave my legs regularly, wear my lashes and tan my white bits, but mainly because those things make me feel better. It's just so important not to loose yourself. So here I am again, wearing my mom jeans, a big weird bag, an oversized jacket & unflattering sunglasses, because I want to.

 

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