Bohemia Design Florence Bag | Mango White Denim Jacket | Asos Farliegh Jeans | H&M Tee | Topshop Knot Sliders
Credit to my gal Jessy at Outfit Orbit for the photos.
Credit to my gal Jessy at Outfit Orbit for the photos.
I have several irrational fears, when I say several, I mean approx. 58-60. They range from the obvious & quite common, like flying, roller coasters & basically any activity where my feet aren't on the ground. To the more obscure, like shouting an offensive word in a quiet public place, people touching my tummy button & really attractive men walking behind me for any distance. The latter one actually happened to me the other day whilst walking to work. I had quite chunky, impractical shoes on anyway (not ideal) but then this God like creature in a suit appeared from a side street. He proceeded to walk a few metres behind me up quite a long road, then BAM the panic set in. I suddenly became very aware of my legs and very conscious that my brain was not sending them the correct signals in order for me to walk properly. It was as though I had never walked before, like a new born deer on ice. I didn't know what to do with my arms either, they felt like they were really heavy and floppy by my side, like couple of gigantic chorizo's. Then I start swinging them a bit to act cool and collected, but as I gain a bit of momentum I feel like they're about fly out my shoulder sockets. I'm getting all clammy just re living it now. It was all very traumatic. I get the same sort of fear if I have to walk past a group of builders, or get up to go for a tinkle in a quiet restaurant or bar. The dread just comes over me and there's nothing I can do to stop it apart from use every ounce of my being to try and walk like a normal person.
Where I was actually going with this post is that I have (nearly) conquered one of my many irrational fears this week. The fear of white denim. Now there's two reasons I fear wearing this hard wearing cotton twill fabric in a light colour (yes I did just google 'what is denim'). The first reason being the fear of it getting dirty and there's nothing I can do. I just know the one day I decide to swap my trusty blue or black denim for white, there will be an accident. Someone will trip and spill their coffee on me, making it looks like I've had some sort of accident. Or I will fall over in the grass and stain my knees, then I will the have to walk round in public with grass stained knees, everyone judging me. Maybe some people pointing and laughing. The second reason for 'the fear' is I worry I will look like I have either just stepped out of Tammy Girl in 1999 or I have just walked out of Topshop in the modern day, but as a 13 year old that's off to drink WKD's in a field. Neither of which is a look I want to go for.
I have tried white denim on many times in the fitting room throughout the years, but I always end up giving it back to the shop assistant, not quite confident in the direction I'm taking me and my white denim in. This was until a couple of weeks ago. I feel like this year is just riddled with milestones and new things for me, so why not bite the bullet and get on board with white denim. I've gone quite timid to start with and opted for a jacket (the grass stain thing still scares me a bit much)... and I love it. I have worn it all the God damn time since I got it. Hence it being in my last 2 posts, it wont be in the next one I promise. I also have brought a pair of white denim culotte jeans from Zara a few weeks ago, but I'm still plucking up the courage to wear them out. Which I will, maybe, eventually. It doesn't help that they were sold out in my size so went for a size up so they're baggy and white... but I guess at least that steers me well clear of my worry of looking like a 13 year old in Joni jeans at least.
So here's to getting over our little irrational fears, who knows, I might let someone poke my tummy button next week.
x
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