FEELING THE PRESSURE OF BLOGGING

 

 

H&M Jersey Top | Asos Farleigh Jeans | Asos Cateye Sunglasses | Primark Straw Bag | Topshop Knot Sliders 

 

As we all know, recently I got dumped (fave middle word school circa 2001) blah blah blah, we know the story -  I don't need to pull at that thread again. You'll all be sick of me. Pre 'the unfortunate event' (we shall call it), my blog was ticking over like clockwork. I've mentioned before, I in no way see myself as a professional influencer, nor do I really aim to be. It's a hobby and a platform that I have had some great opportunities through & connected with some glorious brands and people. I have never taken it, or myself, too seriously, but at the same time I have always been committed to it and put a lot of time into my blog. So baring all this in mind, it was all going tickety boo & progressing just as I wanted it to. My fiancé being my photographer meant I could shoot content pretty much whenever I wanted & I was able to say "yes" to every collaboration, knowing I could meet the deadline. So post 'unfortunate event' I found myself a bit lost, generally and blog wise. How was I going to keep it going? Who will shoot my posts? etc. etc. It literally kept me awake at night & made me realise, that actually, its quite a big part of my life. I felt like I had let myself down a bit though, by adding this extra slice of pressure to what felt like the biggest pile in the world. Especially when its something I enjoy doing & ultimately don't need to do, if worse came to worse. Then I got to the stage where I was questioning whether it was worth the hassle. This thing that I have loved doing for a couple of years is majorly stressing me out, at a time I really don't need to be. Had I fallen out of love with it? Was it time to stop? I started thinking about it, & I'm sure pretty much all bloggers have come to this crossroads in one way or another, & I came up with a simple answer to myself. Just take the pressure off. Easy as that. Keep going, but don't worry about it. At all. My friends and family have chipped in to take photos when I'm out and about with them. I went to the races last weekend with two of my gals, I think I must have said the sentence "can you take a photo for my Instagram" at least 12 - 15 times. They have not witnessed this side of me before, it was always the long suffering boyfriend, but they have all politely nodded whilst probably thinking "what a vain old bitch".  It has been kind of easier said than done to take a step back and force myself not to worry as much. I have turned down some collaborations that are really up my street, just because I know as soon as I get that parcel through the post I will have a mini breakdown about when I will shoot the post, who will do it for me and will the brand like it. That's not how it should be. Normally I rip the parcel open, excited to see what's arrived and try it on. It's hard. It's hard to pass up opportunities that could help you move forward in favour of your current sanity, but something has to give. I was not willing to fall out of love with this hobby and part of my life. I will make it work without putting unnecessary pressure on myself, and who knows. Maybe I will find the perfect Insta husband for me to take those candid shots that you're actually shaking from holding a pose for and have re taken at least 6 times. Maybe he will want to take photos of me and help me progress and grow. Who knows. Until then though, I do know, I will keep going until the fun stops.

 

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